Edelman

1. Show up exactly at 9am
2. Go to kitchen, get cup, drop four ice cubes in glass, one on floor, fill to brim
3. Talk to Co-Worker A for approximately seven minutes
4. Get to desk, wake up computer
5. Check company emails for 15 minutes, deleting 10 unnecessary automatic garbage emails
6. Record on timesheet .25 hours for checking emails
7. Check personal email
8. Check other personal email
9. Check Emory email
   • Respond to inane comment by Chimpo and/or Matt Fine
10. Check internal message board for new work orders
11. See no new work orders, begin surfing internet
    • Read friends' blogs
    • Read ultimate blogs
    • Read random blogs
    • Check personal website statistics
    • Talk on AIM to dad
12. Spontaneous meeting with boss
    • Determine that we're still waiting on collateral from X, Y, and Z clients like we have been for the past three weeks
    • Feign frustration
    • Get assigned random meaningless task
13. Record .25 hours for meeting with boss
14. Perform task in three minutes
15. Record .25 hours for task
16. Re-commence surfing
17. Check personal email
18. Check other personal email
19. Check Emory email
20. Repeat previous four steps
21. Receive work order
22. Perform work order in 10 seconds
23. Record .5 hours on time sheet
24. Email boss and co-worker that work order is complete
25. Worry over what will be put on time sheet to compensate for not working, even though not assigned anything to do
26. Re-commence surfing and email checking
27. Deftly minimize windows at the sound of a single footstep
28. Lunch
29. Finish surfing entire internet
30. Fester in chair staring at Facebook profiles
31. Check emails
32. Fill out timesheet to equal eight hours
33. Leave

Life is good!

Word of the Day: consanguineousadj. of the same blood, related by common ancestor

"A recent study reported that 3 million Irishmen can trace their ancestry back to the same man. In his defense, the man said he had been drinking." -Conan O'Brian, on the consanguinity of the Irish.